Marc Estes

This year I will be celebrating the 30th year of being a parent. I by no means claim to be an expert and have a long ways before I could ever even spell the name, “DOBSIN” (just kidding, I know it is Dobson).  Over these three decades I must admit that I have made many mistakes, yet have also made some good decisions as well. Through it all, I have landed on some basic foundation truths that I  have instilled in my children that have produced some pretty good children that I have grown to deeply love and respect.

If you are just beginning the journey as a parent, or are somewhere along the way, you might read carefully, as each of these truths were forged through much effort on both the part of my wife and I, as well as our children. Here is my top ten list to build strong children:

1. Teach Them to Love God and Cherish His Word – The most important thing you can ever do for your child is to help them see that God is the most important thing in their lives.  If you could only do one thing for your child, teach them to love God and His Word. Make church a priority. Do family devotions. Read the Bible with them. Establish a passion for spiritual disciplines in their lives.
2. Model your Values, Don’t Preach Them – The principle of “Do what I say, not what I do” just doesn’t work. Children become a byproduct of their environment. The language you speak, the music you listen to, the shows you watch, the comments you make about others, the attitudes you carry will most likely become implanted into your children.  I tried my best to show my children certain values, not just tell them certain values. What you live is what they will get!
3. Develop Deep Personal Relationships – The balance to a home that expects high values and morals is deep, personal relationships. Your children are the most important people you could ever spend time with. Let your kids know they are deeply loved. Be honest and transparent. Ask forgiveness when you are wrong. Learn to have fun at their level. 
4. Don’t Compromise Your Convictions for their Acceptance – Learn to stand for your convictions, even if your child is upset with you. I used to always tell my daughters, “I am your father before I am your friend. You won’t like me today, but you will love me tomorrow for sticking with my decisions.”
5. Encourage them to Honor and Respect Authority – Your children must learn to honor those who God has placed over them, even if you may not agree with the leader. They need to honor and respect the position at the very least. If they can learn this in the home, they will develop a lifestyle of respecting God, their spouse, their boss, and their civil leaders. There were many times I stood with a teacher instead of my child in a conflict in order to help them understand the importance of respecting their authority.
6. Challenge them to Stand for What is Right not What is Popular – Children today must be taught to stand for what is right. Their life might depend on it. Teach them certain values before there comes the temptation to challenge them. Teach them that favor with God will always supersede favor with peers.
7. Teach them to Forgive Others – A child must learn that the sun can never go down on their anger. If an offense occurs, challenge them to confront it and deal with it Biblically. Help them to see that unforgiveness poisons the person who won’t forgive more than the one that needs to be forgiven. Help them to live life with a clean heart.
8. Inspire them to Love All People – Go out of  your way to model to them that everyone matters to God, therefore they matter to us. Don’t just say it model it. Give the guy on the street corner some money regardless of what you think. Allow someone to come live with you when they have no place to go. Make comments about those that are being ostracized by other demeaning individuals. Challenge them to invite the child who is all alone over to play. Regardless of a person’s beliefs, behaviors or perspectives, all must be loved.
9. Disciple them to Embrace a Strong Work Ethic – Don’t spoil your kids and rob them of the important lesson of working for a living. Don’t allow them to develop a mentality that they deserve something they have not yet earned. Teach them to work hard. Reward them when the do, and exhort them when they don’t.
10. Direct them to Fulfill Their God-Ordained Purpose – Help them to live every day on purpose. Every moment of every day matters to God. They will be held accountable as to how they lived each day. Help them to maximize the moment. Turn off the TV and put a book in front of them.  Help them discover their talents and abilities. Encourage them to invest their lives into helping others and building the church. Inspire them to live life to the full.

Developing healthy teams requires more strategy than just sharing a common vision. Although vision is important, if a team does not have the respect of it’s leader, the reality of vision fulfillment is greatly diminished. You will find that those who desire to follow you the most are those that respect you the most. Respect is not given, it is earned.

Respect is defined simply as, “The state of being regarded with honor or esteem. Respect is an unassuming resounding force, the stuff that equity and justice are made of.” It means being treated with consideration and esteem and to be willing to treat people similarly. It means to have a regard for other peoples’ feelings, listening to people and hearing them, i.e. giving them one’s full attention. Even more importantly, respect means treating one with dignity. Respect is the opposite of humiliation and contempt. So where the latter can be a cause of conflict, the former and its opposite can help transform it.

There are five “C’s” that you will find that will be necessary in order to develop a team culture where people will respect you as their leader. Try applying these simple, yet crucial principles to your leadership style and watch the respect level rise in your team.

1. Be Consistent – Say what you mean, do what you say, and always be true to your word. Be prompt, professional, and proficient in everything you do.  Model the attributes you desire others to live and remain consistent in your vision, values and philosophy.

 

2. Be Caring – Take the time to find out what is going on in the life of your team members. When you find out that someone is hurting help them. If they are discouraged, lift them up. If they are tired, give them a break. If they make a mistake, send them some grace.

 

3. Be Clear – Learn to be honest even if it hurts. Don’t hold back a concern or frustration and share it with everyone but the person that needs to hear it most. Build a reputation that is honest, up front, real, caring and to the point. Once you share a concern, help them with the solution. Their success is your success.

 

4. Be Courageous – Always be a few steps ahead of your team. Be willing to go where you ask others to go. Stand for your morals and values even if it costs you something… even if it costs you much. Don’t be a reed in the wind, or be double-minded. Have some back bone and stand strong.

 

5. Be Courteous – Model what a polite leader looks like. Give people the respect they deserve. Allow people to share their thoughts even if they don’t seem important to you. Give people your undivided attention. Walk down the hallway and give them the time instead of sending them a text or email if it is a big issue.

 

Respect will be your great ally or a lack of it, will be  your worst nightmare. Maybe today you could take a few steps down the ladder and climb off the platform and give people a little more respect. You never know, you just might benefit from it!

The battle for Christian morals and values continues to escalate on every front. It is almost impossible to go a day without hearing of another confrontation taking place that targets our Christian values. It is ironic that it is now illegal to hand out Bibles in a classroom, but you can hand out condoms. It is a tragedy that a child needs a permission slip to take an aspirin but can have an abortion without a permission slip, or even further without their parents knowledge or consent. To push the line even further, we now have children that are forced to sit in classrooms and be told about what is right and wrong sexual orientation when they are just learning how to write their name!

When is enough, enough? When do we finally make a stand for the sake of our nation and the next generation? When do we get back to the roots of what this country was founded upon and realize the challenges we are facing today are a result of our wandering from the values and truths that made us great?

Well, here it is… a recent post by Chelsea Schilling from the World Net Daily. Put on your seat belt, it is a chilling ride!

A California school district has approved a mandatory homosexual curriculum for children as young as 5 – and parents will not be allowed to remove their children from the lessons.

The mandatory program, officially titled “LGBT Lesson #9,” was approved May 26 by the Alameda school district by a vote of 3-2. Students from kindergarten through fifth grade will learn about “tolerance” for the homosexual lifestyle beginning next year.

The curriculum is in addition to the school’s current anti-bullying program and is estimated to cost $8,000 for curriculum and training.

Parents will not be given an opportunity to opt-out of lessons that go against their religious beliefs. Some parents are threatening to sue the school board and mount a recall. Opponents presented a petition with 468 signatures from people who don’t want the homosexual lessons in the curriculum.

At a meeting, parent Julie Kim said, “The topics covered in this curriculum for all the grades should be left up to the parent to discuss with their children.”

The district’s legal counsel recommended against giving parents an opportunity to opt out of the lessons, claiming only health or sex education topics require opt-out provisions:

[T]he most prudent course of action for Alameda Unified School District’s Board of Education in regards to the proposed lesson is to recommend providing notice to parents, not to allow an opt out of the instruction.

The school district claims it will re-assess the curriculum, but only after it has been in place for a full year. According to the Island of Alameda, trustee Tracy Jensen addressed a crowd at City Hall following the vote.

“We are not telling anyone what to think,” Jensen said. “We are letting children know that gay people exist and they deserve to be treated with respect, regardless of whether or not you believe that homosexuality is acceptable.”

But Capitol Resource Institute’s Karen England explored the curriculum and released a statement condemning the program before the board’s vote.

“This curriculum ignores the fact that every child has a mom and a dad, to redefine ideas like ‘family.’ School absolutely should be a safe place, but this isn’t just about safety. Students have to embrace highly controversial social values or risk being labeled as bigots,” she warned. “Five year old kids aren’t ready to think on their own about sexuality – and their families’ values will be dismissed. That’s not an education in critical thinking. It’s social activism.”

In kindergarten, children will be introduced to “The New Girl … And Me” by Jacqui Robins. The book is about a young girl who is new at a school and strikes up a friendship with another girl after a popular boy refuses to play with her.

In first grade, students will read “Who is in a Family?” By Robert Skutch. It explores different types of families. One page states, ” … Robin’s family is made up of her dad, Clifford, her dad’s partner, Henry, and Robin’s cat, Sassy.”

Teachers will ask children to “identify and describe a variety of families” and “to understand that families have some similarities and some differences.”

“If a student responds that one family in the book is made up of a mother, a father and two children and a cat, you may acknowledge that some families look like this,” the curriculum states, “but also ask students for other examples of what a family can look like.”

Teachers are told to reflect and “reinforce to students that in our school and our community there are many different types of families that provide love and care to each other. Remind the students that all family structures are equally important.”

Second grade students will read about two homosexual penguins that raise a young chick in the book “And Tango Makes Three” by J. Richardson and P. Parnell. The two male penguins, Roy and Silo, are described as being “a little bit different.” “They didn’t spend much time with the girl penguins, and the girl penguins didn’t spend much time with them,” the text states. When the male penguins nurture an egg, it soon hatches. “We’ll call her Tango,” it states, “because it takes two to make a Tango.” The book declares, “Tango was the very first penguin in the zoo to have two daddies.” 

In the third grade, students will watch a film called “That’s a Family,” featuring some homosexual couples in addition to traditional families. According to the lesson plan, it aims to “assist students in developing sensitivity to gay and lesbian family structures” and teach “respect and tolerance for every type of family.”

Fourth graders will be required to read an essay titled, “My School is Accepting – but Things Could be Better” by Robert, an 11-year-old who has two lesbian mothers. They are introduced to terms such as “ally,” “gay,” “lesbian” and “LGBT.” Teachers are instructed to ask, “How do you think Robert feels when he hears people say things like, ‘this is gay’ or ‘You’re so gay’?”

By fifth grade, students learn to “identify stereotypes about lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people.” They are told that “LGBT people have made important contributions within the United States and beyond.” Teachers are asked to write the acronym LGBT and ask students the meaning of each letter. Students discuss why stereotypes are “incorrect and hurtful” to LGBT people and people with LGBT family members.

The children are provided with a list of famous LGBT people,including novelist James Baldwin, singer Elton John, comedian Ellen Degeneres, pop singer Christina Aguilera, Rep. Tammy Baldwin, poet Walt Whitman, singer Lance Bass, figure skater Rudy Galindo, homosexual politician Harvey Milk, Army veteran Jose Zuniga and basketball player Sheryl Swoopes.

 Teachers then ask if students are surprised to learn that those famous people are members of the LGBT community. The curriculum also provides a list of LGBT vocabulary words for students, including the following: bisexual, transgender, gay, LGBT and lesbian.

One of my most recent posts regarding Steve Jobs willingness to stand for the truth has shown me one thing; people today are very encouraged by those who are willing to stand for the truth. I came across another great leader, Principal Jody McLeod, who took a BOLD stand and declared some daring truth to her listening audience. This statement was read over the PA system at the football game at Roane County High School , Kingston , Tennessee.  It just might be as bold of a stand as Steve Job. Read it and you decide:

“It has always been the custom at Roane County High School football games, to say a prayer and play the National Anthem, to honor God and Country.” Due to a recent ruling by the Supreme Court, I am told that saying a Prayer is a violation of Federal Case Law. As I understand the law at this time, I can use this public facility to approve of sexual perversion and call it “an alternate life style,” and if someone is offended, that’s OK.

I can use it to condone sexual promiscuity, by dispensing condoms and calling it, “safe sex..” If someone is offended, that’s OK. I can even use this public facility to present the merits of killing an unborn baby as a “viable! means of birth control.” If someone is offended, no problem….

I can designate a school day as “Earth Day” and involve students in activities to worship religiously and praise the goddess “Mother Earth” and call it “ecology..” I can use literature, videos and presentations in the classroom that depicts people with strong, traditional Christian convictions as “simple minded” and “ignorant” and call it “enlightenment..”

However, if anyone uses this facility to honor GOD and to ask HIM to Bless this event with safety and good sportsmanship, then Federal Case Law is violated.. This appears to be inconsistent at best, and at worst, diabolical. Apparently, we are to be tolerant of everything and anyone, except GOD and HIS Commandments.

Nevertheless , as a school principal, I frequently ask staff and students to abide by rules with which they do not necessarily agree. For me to do otherwise would be inconsistent at best, and at worst, hypocritical… I suffer from that affliction enough unintentionally. I certainly do not need to add an intentional transgression.

For this reason, I shall “Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s,” and refrain from praying at this time.
“However, if you feel inspired to honor, praise and thank GOD and ask HIM, in the name of JESUS, to Bless this event, please feel free to do so. As far as I know, that’s not against the law—-yet.”

One by one, the people in the stands bowed their heads, held hands with one another and began to pray.  They prayed in the stands.. They prayed in the team huddles. They prayed at the concession stand and they prayed in the Announcer’s Box! The only place they didn’t pray was in the Supreme Court of the United States of America- the Seat of “Justice” in the “one nation, under GOD.”

Somehow, Kingston , Tennessee Remembered what so many have forgotten. We are given the Freedom OF Religion, not the Freedom FROM Religion. Praise GOD that HIS remnant remains!

JESUS said, “If you are ashamed of ME before men, then I will be ashamed of you before MY FATHER…” 

Why not take a moment and forward this to a friend and inspire them to make a bold stand for truth today!

 

“Americans show much greater interest in religion than sports, but it receives far less attention from the news media.” So began an article about discoveries by Robert Bellah, a sociologist at the University of California in Berkeley. He collected comparative statistics on the two most defining areas: financial participation and personal involvement.

Americans gave $56.7 billion to religious groups. That compares with $4 billion spent on major league baseball, football, and basketball. (That’s fourteen times as much money given toward religion). In attendance, Gallup revealed that 5.6 billion seats were filled for church in same year. During the same time period 103 million went to watch the three main professional sports leagues.

Total attendance for all college and professional sporting events, including everything from tennis to dog racing, was 388 million. That is still thirteen times fewer people in the ballpark than in the church. In one month more people turned out for worship–about 433 million–than the 388 million spectators who attended all college and professional sporting events in one year. We live in a sports-crazed culture, but the statistics reveal most Americans are still very interested in God.

I sure love a great play off game, but at the end of the day, one day in His house is better than a thousand sports games elsewhere!

One of the most fulfilling things I do is sharing God’s Word with those who will listen. It is amazing to see how the spoken Word can transform a life in significant ways. I would be a testimony to that claim. It is humbling to think that God would use you as a vessel to deliver His Word. It is even more humbling when people thank you for pouring into their lives, knowing that you have little to do with it.

I know that many of you may not have the time, nor be interested in listening to another message. However, if you have some time and need a variety of fresh challenges for you life, I have uploaded more of my messages for your listening pleasure. There are many of you that have requested some new, fresh messages, so I took some time to get them uploaded for you. If you get a chance, send me a note and let me know how God spoke to you while listening. 

All of my messages can be found on my MESSAGE page of my blog.  Here is a list of the new messages for you. Thanks for listening!

     A Called Generation

     Going in Power and Authority

     Life Beyond the Mask

     The Person of the Holy Spirit

     Unleashing the Power of Prayer

     Who Will You Become

     World Changers – Blessed are the Merciful

     World Changers – Blessed are the Peacemakers

     World Changers – Blessed are the Pure in Heart

 

Most of us work in a fairly fast paced, complex world. It seems that there is always another mountain to take, river to cross, giant to kill, and responsibility to fulfill. As we power through our long list of ‘to do’ items and file last weeks project action plans, it is important to stop and celebrate the wins with those who work with you and for you. There is one thing for sure, we don’t celebrate our accomplishments enough!

If you are going to celebrate what you have accomplished there might be a few things you might considering doing:

1. Take the time to reflect – At the end of every week, or the end of every project, stop and ponder what you have just done. Look at where you have been and where you have now arrived and appreciate the accomplishments you have made.

 

2. Make the Win Definable – Develop a one-liner, or something that is easy for every one on the team to grasp.  We understand this in the world of sports; a goal is a win in soccer, a touchdown is a win in football and a strike is a win in bowling (did I just use bowling as an illustration? Wow!) When everyone understood what a win looks like and then you accomplish it as a team, everyone can see that the team won. Define it!

 

3. Make everyone a part of the Win- Tennis and Golf are lonely sports. They may be fun to watch, but nothing like when a team wins the world series and dog-pile in the middle of the field. Spectators make the best critics. If you really want to create some momentum with those you serve, let them own the win as well.

 

4. Look for ways to win regularly- The greatest factor to momentum is being acknowledged and appreciated regularly. One win a year is not enough. Look for ways to celebrate weekly accomplishments by sending out an email, twitter or Facebook comment. Talk about people in your weekly staff meeting. Look for ways to win regularly.

 

5. Don’t beat anyone up when you lose – Losing is a part of the game, and when we do, we learn from the disappointment and ultimately look at the loss as win as well. Babe Ruth was one of the greatest striker-outers of all time, yet he is known for getting up to the plate, pointing towards the fence and scoring the win. Next time you don’t quite reach the goal, gather those around you, share what you learned through the loss, point at the fence, and hit it out of the park!

 

We all have been influenced by something and the effect of that influence had shaping power in our lives. Influence is a fragile, yet powerful entity that has the ability to both enhance or destroy the lives of others. In addition to being influenced, each of us have been put in a place of influence. There are varying degrees, but each person has some form of influence on those around them whether it is conscious or sub concious. Learning how to use your influence to benefit the lives of others is a key quality that every person should attempt to possess:

I recently came across a list of influence methods, compiled by a man names Stephen Covey. He is definitely a person who understands the power of influence. This is a brief list, which requires little explanation. Read them and see which ones you might considering improving in your life:

1. Refrain from saying the unkind or negative thing.
2. Exercise patience with others.
3. Distinguish between the person and the behavior or performance.
4. Perform anonymous service.
5. Choose the proactive response to every situation.
6. Keep the promises you make to others.
7. Focus on the circle of influence.
8. Live the law of love.
9. Assume the best of others.
10. Seek first to understand.
11. Reward open, honest expressions or questions.
12. Given understanding responses.
13. If offended, take the initiative to restore.
14. Admit your mistakes, apologize and ask forgiveness.
15. Let arguments fly out open windows.
16. Go one on one.
17. Renew your commitment to those you love.
18. Be influenced by others before trying to influence others.
19. Accept people unconditionally even though you might not approve of their decisions.
20. Prepare your heart and mind before you prepare your speech.
21. Avoid fight or flight; talk through your differences.
22. Recognize and take time to teach others.
23. Agree on the limits, rules, expectations and consequences before entering into an agreement.
24. Don’t give up and don’t give in.
25. Be there at the cross roads.
26. Speak the language of logic and emotion the build others up.
27. Delegate effectively with the best interest of others in mind.
28. Involve others in meaningful service; give others ownership.
29. Train others in the law of the harvest;  you reap what you sow.
30. Let consequences motivate you to right behavior.

 

I have never met a person who had a strategic plan to destroy their life. I am sure these people do exist, but am sure they would be far and few between. Most people today have some form of action plan to move them from where they are at, to where they want to be, however the enticements of the world pry their way into our lives derailing us from what we are destined to be. If we are not careful, these subtle oddities can ultimately become the very snare that robs us from reaching our full potential.

Mahatma Gandhi once mentioned the seven most deadly sins that would insure personal destruction. Here they are for your review:

1. Having wealth without work- This has the idea that you desire to get things for nothing. You have a tendency to manipluate, short-cut, coerise, excuse your way around the value of hard work and paying the price needed to obtain the prize. Our culture today, is a get rich quick, I want it now but will pay later culture. The thought of having to pay the price before receiving the reward is often an agitation vs. a virtue.

 

2. Seeking pleasure without a conscience – This sin pursues the satisfaction of fleshly desires with the ability to drown out character, integrity and right decision making.  Most decisions are framed with the idea, “What is in this for me?” Greed, pride, selfishness are the key traits of this deadly disease.

 

3. Possessing Knowledge without character – As dangerous as a little knowledge may be, even more dangerous is much knowledge without strong, principle-driven character.  Great knowledge can become a great hindrance if you lack the character qualities in order to direct the knowledge. You can be very smart, yet foolish at the same time.  Establishing a set of core-values and living by them is one of the only antidotes to this terminal disease.

 

4. Conducting business without ethics- Every business transaction conducted in both our private and public life have a moral challenge attached. Do we operate with honesty and integrity? Do we exceed the expectation of others or just reach the minimum requirements. A moral sense of stewardship in our work world, personal finances, tithing, taxes and investment of time are all areas that have been greatly eroded in recent years.

 

5. Science without humanity- You might not feel that this applies to you personally, but there are many scientific advancements we are exploring today in our world that do cross the line and do have grave consequences to you, your children and children’s children.  How we believe and stand for issues such as stem-cell research, use of embryos, human cloning all have a huge consequence to our future as we know it. I am all for the advancement of science, medicine and technology, but it must not cross the lines of jeapordizing the purpose of humanity.

 

6. Having religion without sacrifice- There is a great divide between what many believe and how they behave. The idea of sacrifice is so “UN-American” and cuts cross grain to the main message of our culture today. Laying your life down for another, giving of your time and money to help out another or build a church have become strongly resisted and highly discouraged. We want the “Grace and Love” message, but what about living life beyond yourself?

 

7. Having Politics without Principle – NUFF SAID! What is missing today in our political leaders is the commitment to lead their personal lives and leadership responsibilities on a set of godly, truth-based principles. Being popular and accepted is more important than being right. The cost of this deadly sin, will have a colossal impact on the world as we know it, unless there are some radical changes within the leadership of our nation, or the voting trends of the people.

 

How are  you doing with these seven deadly sins? What changes should be making to remove these terminal diseases? It is never too late to make a change today. I think Mahatma Gandhi had it right!

There is an annual survey put out by the Chronicle of Higher Education that surveys the attitudes of professors abroad, which includes their political persuasion as well.  I was surprised to find that Liberals far outnumber the Conservatives in the academic arena by more than two to one and there is even a much higher percentage in the two areas of social sciences and humanities. These stats even escalate when you isolate the study to the elite universities. Is this trend due to that fact that Liberals are just more intelligent that Conservatives?

Dinesh D’Souza states an interesting perspective on this issue. He says, “Conservatives tend to go into business because they care more about money; liberals tend to go into the academy because they care more about power. One reason for this divergence of interests is that conservatives in general are practical people – they emphasize what works – while liberals are theoretical people – they emphasize what ought to work.”

I do understand that there is some balance to this statement but would love to hear your perspective and opinion on this issue. What do you think the result of this study would be on our current academic and business sectors? How do you think this line of thinking has affected society today? Let me know your thoughts.